It was half an hour past my bedtime; I should have been cozy in bed, fast asleep. But here I was, pacing around my kitchen—­again—­my attention fixated on the box of granola bars in the pantry.

I know I shouldn’t eat one.

More pacing.

It’s not on my plan.

I paced some more.

But it has chocolate chips!

By the time I entered my staring contest with that granola bar, I’d already spent hours ruminating on everything the enemy wanted me to believe.

I’ve already blown it.

It’s too late to make a different choice.

I might as well eat the granola bar and try to do better tomorrow.

I was stuck, and I couldn’t see a way out. Maybe you feel that way too.

How We Get Stuck

The truth is, I wasn’t able to keep following all the diet rules for long. I broke those laws every single day. 

Do it “right” or don’t do it at all, my Diet Dictator demanded.

A crucial part of midlife is embracing the bitter and the sweet and then learning to let go completely.

And looking at life through what I call the Control Filter is a tactic we must practice forever. To help, I’ve compiled a list of all the things you can control:

• Your words 
• Your attitudes and opinion 
• Your thoughts 
• Your actions and reactions 
• Your choices in life moving forward 

What You Can’t Control

Did you notice what isn’t included on the list? Your background, your history, your upbringing, and many of the things that do in fact pertain to you and your body and your one precious, beautiful life but remain largely out of your control. Yes, you do have agency over your body and yourself, but often your ingrained reactions and emotions, your thoughts, and your behaviors are largely due to outside circumstances that have conspired together to form patterns without you even realizing it.

What we need to harness here instead is our limited agency, or our ability to recognize destructive patterns and grasp control of those things over which we actually have some influence.

Don’t be ashamed if you need to get help. We are not meant to struggle alone. 

A woman emailed me to schedule an organizing session a couple of weeks ago. She said she’d been following me on my email list for a few years and wished she’d reached out a long time ago. She needed help.

I instantly loved her when I met her.

You know how God says He loves a humble and contrite heart? {Psalm 34:18; Psalm 51:17}

Her heart was tender and vulnerable. Hearts like that are easy to love.

She’d gone through a broken marriage and infertility and was now living on her own. Her dreams had not turned out like she thought they would at this point in her life.

During these hard times, she started thrifting. She loved finding a good deal and it brought her joy to spend her time searching for and purchasing deals.

Her home was getting cluttered. Boxes she had moved a year ago were still unopened. Laundry had piled up because her washing machine had broke a few weeks back and although she had gotten a new one she hadn’t caught up.

Don’t believe the lie that you have to put your health on the back burner. Start fresh right now so you can feel your best!

I love the feel of a fresh start and a new year. Although I don’t merely make goals at the beginning of the year, I do use this time to evaluate what goals I met in the previous year and what I would like to freshen up for the coming year.

I’ve always been a bit health conscious, even if I didn’t put in the effort to be healthy. I know how difficult it can be with small children. Now that my children are older and it is a bit easier, looking back there are a few things I wish I would have had on hand to help me.

Before I share some amazing tools to help you in your health journey, I want you to be encouraged that your health matters.

Why Your Health Matters

There is a certain stigma associated with caring for oneself being perceived as selfish. Let’s just banish that lie right here. Yes, there is a difference between self-care and self-indulgence.

The other day I was sharing with my own life coach how my current project has turned into a mountain. I was overwhelmed. I felt stuck.

“It will never be done by my deadline. I had to add over 20 additional time-consuming tasks to my list. Now I have to push my whole schedule back. I am forced to do so many other things I hadn’t planned.”

And on and on.

She noticed the drama in the way I was talking and brought it to my attention.

I continued to tell her, “But, those are just facts. It’s true. I can’t move on until I have those additional tasks done. I’ll never finish by my deadline. I have no choice. Those are just the facts.

She said they were not the facts.

I have a choice.

Nobody is forcing me.

I don’t have to do the 20 additional tasks if I choose not to.

Do you ever feel like the fight for happy skin is a losing battle? Well, you’re not alone. Here’s a starter list of things I use myself, that I compiled for you!!! I hope all of these items are easy to incorporate into your routine, while making a noticeable change for the better.

1. Drink More Water

Wow, did you know that already?

Ok, so most people know they’re supposed to drink a certain amount of water. But how much really are we supposed to be drinking?!? To help your skin stay hydrated, start with the basic 8×8 rule. The 8×8 rule is eight 8 oz glasses a day! Try getting a cute water bottle to motivate you and track how much water you drink on a daily basis for a week. You might be surprised by how little you are actually consuming!

You might like this Stainless Steel water bottle, or this Fruit Infuser water bottle could be more your style, or maybe you’d like to keep it classic.

2. Take your makeup off before sleeping! 

If you’re leaving makeup on while you sleep, you are letting it mix with the oil and dirt that builds up throughout the day which results in clogged pores.

I’ve been bleeding for four months.

Four months I’ve painstakingly tucked hygiene items in my purse and urgently sent my husband to the store. I’ve seen one practitioner after another and watched needles slide into my veins. I’ve given up caffeine, sugar, gluten, dairy and – it seems like – given up a part of my life.

The bleeding triggers a painful autoimmune skin condition, so as I make sure my bathroom is stocked, I must also stock my shelves with special lotions, my fridge with special foods, and my heart with a special kind of strength.

I’m tired of my broken body.

The birth of my daughters triggered this condition. It was so bad with my first, I wasn’t sure I could bear to have another. But we did – and there are now days when I look at my precious blessings with gratitude and tears because I love them so much! But this hurts. My face, my arms, my body – they’re broken and hurting in an unexplainable way, at least for the moment.

Where is God in a Woman’s Pain?

I’ve dealt with these hormonal issues for over three years now, and at first, I treated them as a merely physical issue.

I like to have a busy schedule, serious responsibilities, and a new task always in the distance. But, while I enjoyed the hustle, this lifestyle used to make me into the most uptight person you’d ever meet. Sure I’d cover it up with a smile and overly bubbly welcome if I saw you. But inwardly, my mind would be spinning around a thousand possibilities, impending tasks, responsibilities, bad outcomes, and potential impending doom. 😉

A couple of years back I decided I didn’t want to live my life that way anymore. I wanted to be busy, fully give myself into every aspect of my life, but still maintain composure and peace. I saw that when stressed and anxious, I was wholly prevented from appropriately loving and caring for other people. So I’ve come up with little methods and attitude changes that help me calm and reset my focus on what matters, during the days when I felt most overwhelmed. Here are a few of those ideas … I hope they help and encourage you like they do me!

1. Spend a few minutes in the word. 

Often stress comes from feelings of overwhelm and inadequateness.