{"id":22370,"date":"2017-10-18T17:00:45","date_gmt":"2017-10-19T00:00:45","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/club31women.com\/?p=22370"},"modified":"2019-11-25T09:17:04","modified_gmt":"2019-11-25T17:17:04","slug":"books-supporting-adoptive-parents","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/club31women.com\/books-supporting-adoptive-parents\/","title":{"rendered":"Books To Empower Supporting Adoptive Parents"},"content":{"rendered":"

Supporting adoption doesn’t necessarily require a family to adopt. Supporting adoptive families is a great way to get involved.\u00a0<\/em><\/p>\n

\"\"<\/p>\n

Adoption is an important part of God\u2019s heart.<\/p>\n

After all, it\u2019s what He desires for all of us\u2014that we, who were once lost to Him, will become daughters and sons.<\/p>\n

There is something miraculously beautiful about taking those who were not family and drawing them in, giving them a place to belong. It carries the fragrance of His glory. It\u2019s so, so good and important and breathtaking.<\/p>\n

But the reality is that not everyone can adopt. Especially when it comes to the adoption of older children.<\/p>\n

Where we are in our life, with our biological families, and in our finances, can drastically alter our ability to bring an orphaned child home. That\u2019s not to say any of those reasons can\u2019t be overcome, but they are still there and must be reckoned with in some way or another.<\/p>\n

Yet, if you have a heart for orphans, there is still\u00a0much\u00a0<\/em>you can do.<\/p>\n

There is preventive work that can be done, where men and women are tirelessly trying to keep families together who are struggling through poverty.<\/p>\n

And there is the support of those who\u00a0are\u00a0<\/em>adopting or\u00a0have\u00a0<\/em>adopted.<\/p>\n

I want to share with you a list of resources that can transform your understanding of adoption and can teach you to be a great support and help to those who have brought a child home.<\/p>\n

This post may\u00a0contain affiliate links through which\u00a0Club31Women might get a small compensation \u2013 with no additional cost to you. \u00a0See my disclosure policy here.<\/a><\/em><\/p>\n

Upside Down: Understanding and Supporting Attachment in Adoptive Families<\/em><\/a><\/h2>\n

\"\"<\/a><\/p>\n

Often there is a level of curiosity and confusion when it comes to parents who are raising adopted children, specifically those adopted over the age of three. They do odd things at times and have weird rules and don\u2019t seem to treat all of their children the same.<\/p>\n

The long and short of it is that\u00a0all<\/em>\u00a0children who are adopted have been through trauma, and the older a child is when adopted the more trauma they will most likely have experienced. This changes things. What may be simple for one child, becomes overwhelmingly hard for a child whose brain has been affected by trauma.<\/p>\n

The most important thing for an adopted child is for them to learn to attach to their new family, but with trauma comes attachment disorders that are hard to explain and even harder to navigate. Adoptive parents are constantly juggling other people\u2019s opinions with what is needed to help their child heal.<\/p>\n

What they need from others is a deep understanding and support. Enter this book,\u00a0Upside Down<\/em><\/a>.<\/p>\n

As an adoptive-mama to two older adopted children, I almost cried when I read\u00a0Upside Down<\/a>.<\/em>\u00a0Encouraging, written from a Christian perspective and written to both adoptive parents AND their friends, family, and community– it is an incredible resource!<\/p>\n

If you have adopted, or know someone who had adopted, this book should be on your shelf (and in your church library!).<\/p>\n

Daring to Hope: Finding God\u2019s Hope in the Broken and the Beautiful<\/em><\/a><\/h2>\n

\"\"<\/a><\/p>\n

Katie Majors, author of the NY Times bestselling book, Kisses From Katie, just released her new book Daring to Hope. Katie is a missionary and adoptive mother, who adopted 13 girls in Uganda while she was still single.<\/p>\n

This book is full of life lessons for all of us, but it also gives a glimpse into what it means to love on\u00a0the least of these<\/em>. Not from a distance, but from your own living room. While Katie’s life in Uganda may seem distant to some, for those who have adopted it feels very close. The trials and upheavals are similar to many that I face daily, either from day to day interactions or from my children’s pasts.<\/p>\n

Whether your friend\u2019s adopted children are from Uganda or US Foster Care, they have been marked by loss and Katie\u2019s reminders of why and how we hope are so important.<\/p>\n

HeartBridge<\/a><\/em>\u00a0and\u00a0A Heart to Belong<\/a><\/em><\/h2>\n

\"\"<\/a><\/p>\n

\"\"<\/a><\/p>\n

Every adopted child\u2019s story is different, but as I mentioned, they all include one thing: trauma.<\/p>\n

Yet, because of the personal aspect of trauma, many adoptive parents are limited in what they can share with the average person. It\u2019s not that we don\u2019t want anyone to know what has happened to our child, but that we\u00a0can\u2019t\u00a0<\/em>just tell everyone. Our children\u2019s stories are their own and while we may choose a few select people to share deeper with for the sake of our sanity and well-being, we\u00a0can\u2019t<\/em>\u00a0and\u00a0won\u2019t\u00a0<\/em>tell the majority of their story to the majority of people.<\/p>\n

A huge part of our job as adoptive parents is protecting our children, from themselves and others, until they reach the age where they can understand and work through their own story.<\/p>\n

That said, there are many other ways to learn about the trauma that leaves a child in need of a\u00a0family, ways that don\u2019t involve trying to learn the particulars about your friend\u2019s adopted kids. Two excellent books are by a Mennonite gentleman, Johnny Miller, who ran an orphanage in Romania.\u00a0HeartBridge<\/a>\u00a0<\/em>and\u00a0A Heart to Belong<\/em><\/a>\u00a0share heartwarming but realistic stories about the trials and joys of working to heal the after-effects of trauma on children.<\/p>\n

Whether you get a chance to read some of these books or not, I pray you take the time to encourage the adoptive mamas around you. Give them a hug, drop them an encouraging note, let them know you are thinking of them, and make sure to pray for them.<\/p>\n

Blessings,
\nNatasha<\/p>\n

P.S. Here’s my list of 4 Refreshing Books for Moms of Older Adopted Children<\/a>.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Here at Club31Women, we recognize that not everyone has the same taste or point of view on books, music, or movies, but we offer these short reviews for your consideration. Our hope is that you will find something new and wonderful on this list of recommended resources!<\/em>
~ Club31Women<\/p>\n

\r\n

\"Natasha<\/a><\/em>Natasha Metzler<\/strong> writes from a small farm in Northern New York where she lives with her husband and three miracle children. In between homeschooling the older kids she blogs and writes books. Pain Redeemed<\/a><\/em> tells the story of her journey through infertility and Counting Grains of Sand<\/a><\/em> tells of how God built her family from splintered pieces. She also writes fiction that celebrates the goodness of the Father, like her\u00a0Women of Promise series<\/a>\u00a0and the allegorical fairy tales found in her\u00a0Daughters of the King collection<\/a>.\u00a0You can find her blogging at natashametzler.com<\/a>, on Facebook<\/a>, Instagram<\/a>, and Twitter<\/a>.<\/p>\r\n<\/div>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Supporting adoption doesn’t necessarily require a family to adopt. Supporting adoptive families is a great way to get involved.\u00a0 Adoption is an important part of God\u2019s heart. After all, it\u2019s what He desires for all of us\u2014that we, who were once lost to Him, will become daughters and sons. There is something miraculously beautiful about…<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":4,"featured_media":22532,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"om_disable_all_campaigns":false,"wprm-recipe-roundup-name":"","wprm-recipe-roundup-description":"","_kad_blocks_custom_css":"","_kad_blocks_head_custom_js":"","_kad_blocks_body_custom_js":"","_kad_blocks_footer_custom_js":"","_monsterinsights_skip_tracking":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_active":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_note":"","_monsterinsights_sitenote_category":0,"_kad_post_transparent":"","_kad_post_title":"","_kad_post_layout":"","_kad_post_sidebar_id":"","_kad_post_content_style":"","_kad_post_vertical_padding":"","_kad_post_feature":"","_kad_post_feature_position":"","_kad_post_header":false,"_kad_post_footer":false,"_kad_post_classname":"","footnotes":""},"categories":[349,345],"tags":[],"coauthors":[],"class_list":["post-22370","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-book-list","category-non-fiction"],"yoast_head":"\nBooks To Empower Supporting Adoptive Parents - Club31Women<\/title>\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"Adoption doesn't need to be restricted to certain families. 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