{"id":87729,"date":"2024-10-01T18:00:00","date_gmt":"2024-10-02T01:00:00","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/club31women.com\/?p=87729"},"modified":"2024-10-02T18:08:08","modified_gmt":"2024-10-03T01:08:08","slug":"when-you-want-to-quit-your-marriage","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/club31women.com\/when-you-want-to-quit-your-marriage\/","title":{"rendered":"When You Want to Quit Your Marriage"},"content":{"rendered":"\n<p><em>Feeling tempted to quit your marriage? Learn the struggles couples face and how turning to Jesus brings healing and restoration.<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n<div class=\"wp-block-image\">\n<figure class=\"aligncenter size-large\"><img decoding=\"async\" width=\"1024\" height=\"683\" src=\"https:\/\/club31women.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2024\/10\/club31women_When-You-Want-to-Quit-Your-Marriage-1024x683.jpg\" alt=\"\" class=\"wp-image-87732\" srcset=\"https:\/\/club31women.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2024\/10\/club31women_When-You-Want-to-Quit-Your-Marriage-1024x683.jpg 1024w, https:\/\/club31women.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2024\/10\/club31women_When-You-Want-to-Quit-Your-Marriage-300x200.jpg 300w, https:\/\/club31women.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2024\/10\/club31women_When-You-Want-to-Quit-Your-Marriage-768x512.jpg 768w, https:\/\/club31women.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2024\/10\/club31women_When-You-Want-to-Quit-Your-Marriage-560x373.jpg 560w, https:\/\/club31women.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2024\/10\/club31women_When-You-Want-to-Quit-Your-Marriage.jpg 1200w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 1024px) 100vw, 1024px\" \/><\/figure>\n<\/div>\n\n\n<p>Most of us marry with stars in our eyes and expectations that scrape the Milky Way. But there\u2019s not a spouse on earth who hasn\u2019t experienced harsh unexpected disappointments.&nbsp;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Have you entertained the thought of quitting your marriage at some level? Like piles of heavy wet snow on power lines and branches, accumulated hurts and disillusionment threaten to snap personal resolve as easily as limbs surrender to the overwhelming weight of winter\u2019s crystals.&nbsp;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>For Dennis and me, our overarching marriage narrative is a wonderful one because it is a tale of redemption. But in those hard places, before the redemption moments came, before it was spring again, we both experienced the pain of disappointment and loss. <strong>I wondered if we\u2019d ever see beauty once more, or if we\u2019d have to settle for a long winter.<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n<h2 class=\"wp-block-heading\"><strong>The Temptation to Quit<\/strong><\/h2>\n\n\n\n<p>I wanted to quit my marriage\u2014not end it entirely, but I wanted to stop trying so hard in the cold heavy parts of our relationship.&nbsp;I felt,&nbsp;\u201cThis is too hard, we aren\u2019t getting anywhere.\u201d&nbsp;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>I\u2019ve been tempted, and these are real temptations from the enemy of our souls, to &#8230;&nbsp;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<ul class=\"wp-block-list\">\n<li>quit sex;<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li>quit working so hard to understand and be understood;<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li>quit serving and giving myself;<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li>quit biting my tongue and watching my words;<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li>quit trying and settle into d\u00e9tente.<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n\n\n\n<p>Quitting any area of marriage is slamming a door shut on intimacy. Like a thermometer, intimacy is the rising or falling temperature of your marital oneness and depth.&nbsp;Intimacy is not just sex. It\u2019s communication, sacrificial love, self-control, courage \u2026 and sex.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>What do you do when you feel hope is lost and you want to quit?<\/p>\n\n\n\n<h2 class=\"wp-block-heading\"><strong>What to Do When You Feel Like Quitting<\/strong><\/h2>\n\n\n\n<p>Ponder this question in reply:&nbsp;Why do you think Jesus spent so much time with tax-gatherers and sinners as the Pharisees so sharply accused?&nbsp;Quite simply because He knew that&nbsp;<em>they knew<\/em>&nbsp;their inadequacies and failures. Jesus saw hope for new life, new light in those men and women and children who understood they were broken, needy sinners.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Jesus taught, <em>\u201cBlessed are the poor in spirit, for theirs is the kingdom of heaven\u201d<\/em> (Matthew 5:3). Simply stated,&nbsp;we can\u2019t receive the gifts of the kingdom unless we know we cannot attain them or buy them or earn them on our own.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><strong>We struggle and want to quit in our marriages because we underestimate the sinful natures of our spouse and ourselves.<\/strong> Marriage is hard because, in the words of Ruth Bell Graham, it\u2019s the union of two sinners. As Romans 3:23 tells us, <em>\u201call have sinned and fall short of the glory of God.\u201d<\/em>&nbsp;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>I still remember some crisis points in our marriage. I felt frightened a few times, fearing we\u2019d never find common ground again. I felt lonely, knowing we weren\u2019t operating out of oneness and because I didn\u2019t have anyone I could talk to. I felt unappreciated that my efforts to love, serve, and help weren\u2019t met with the gratitude I had expected.&nbsp;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>At my core, I was upset because&nbsp;<em>I<\/em>&nbsp;wasn\u2019t getting what&nbsp;<em>I<\/em>&nbsp;wanted. Life wasn\u2019t working the way&nbsp;<em>I <\/em>thought it should.&nbsp;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>And I wanted to quit because I realized I wasn\u2019t able to make it all work.&nbsp;Paul said basically the same thing when he wrote,&nbsp;<em>\u201cFor I know that nothing good dwells in me, that is, in my flesh. For I have the desire to do what is right, but not the ability to carry it out\u201d<\/em> (Romans 7:18).<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Though I felt emotions that scared me, God wasn\u2019t bothered when I wanted to surrender and quit trying.&nbsp;In fact, He kinda liked me in that barren winter place \u2026 discovering that my expectations weren\u2019t working \u2026 finding I wasn\u2019t sufficient in myself to make everything work in my marriage.&nbsp;He knew I was disappointed with Him, too, and that didn\u2019t bother Him a bit.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Why? Because <strong>true marriage is the union of three, not two.<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n<h2 class=\"wp-block-heading\"><strong>Jesus as the Third Person in Marriage<\/strong><\/h2>\n\n\n\n<p>In those alone moments when I had nothing else to try, no book with ten tips waiting on my nightstand, I prayed one of many desperate prayers over the years. I told God, \u201cI have no idea what to do next, no idea what to say or try. Will You show me? Will you guide me?\u201d&nbsp;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Never was there an immediate reply. I always wished for one, but learned to rest in His mysterious ways, to trust He could somehow break the ice \u2026 make a way \u2026 open my eyes to His beauty.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>And that is what He wanted. \u201cCome to Me,\u201d Jesus said.&nbsp;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>I was inadequate \u2026 my own attempts a failure \u2026 and I needed Jesus and only Jesus.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>So what do you do when you feel hope is lost and you want to quit?<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><strong>Come to Jesus.&nbsp;<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>His strength will help you resist the darkness that threatens; the darkness of unbelief and resignation \u2026 the darkness of lost hope.&nbsp;<em>IF you will ask and IF you really want to follow Him.<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>His light will shine on your heart to illumine false thinking, small and large steps of new understanding.<em>&nbsp;IF you are willing to see your sin; IF you are willing to change.&nbsp;<\/em>(Is there that much sin in me? Oh yes, there is.)<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>When you come to Jesus, the third Person in your marriage, remember:&nbsp;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<ul class=\"wp-block-list\">\n<li>He is always praying for you to choose His way. Hebrews 7:25 says Christ <em>\u201calways lives to make intercession\u201d<\/em> for us.\u00a0<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li>He is your husband when yours fails. Isaiah 54:5 tells us, \u201c<em>For your Maker is your husband.\u201d<\/em><\/li>\n\n\n\n<li><a href=\"http:\/\/bit.ly\/2rBgweZ\" rel=\"nofollow sponsored noopener\" target=\"_blank\">He is your dearest Friend<\/a>\u00a0when you have no one. Jesus says, <em>\u201cYou are my friends if you do what I command you\u201d<\/em> (John 15:14).<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li>He is your Comforter when you feel all alone; <em>\u201cEven though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil, for you are with me\u201d<\/em> (Psalm 23:4).<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li><a href=\"http:\/\/bit.ly\/2tQYnw5\" rel=\"nofollow sponsored noopener\" target=\"_blank\">He waits to guide you by His Spirit<\/a>; <em>\u201cWhen the Spirit of truth comes, he will guide you into all truth\u201d<\/em> (John 16:13).<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n\n\n\n<p>Your challenge and mine is to believe all this is true and walk by faith when our feelings tell us the opposite.&nbsp;It\u2019s what Jesus did all His life, but especially on the cross. And because He did, He can help us follow His steps.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<h2 class=\"wp-block-heading\"><strong>God\u2019s Joy in Restoring Relationships<\/strong><\/h2>\n\n\n\n<p><strong>God\u2019s greatest joy is to rescue, resurrect and restore.&nbsp;It\u2019s His specialty.<\/strong> He loves to take broken hearts, fractured relationships, and shattered hope, and restore it to better than it was before.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>I pray you will make your marriage health your highest goal, seeking to grow your relationship with your husband and your Savior.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>May you, too, be counted among those who didn\u2019t quit because you didn\u2019t discover the wonder of the Resurrection!<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Feeling tempted to quit your marriage? Learn the struggles couples face and how turning to Jesus brings healing and restoration. Most of us marry with stars in our eyes and expectations that scrape the Milky Way. But there\u2019s not a spouse on earth who hasn\u2019t experienced harsh unexpected disappointments.&nbsp; Have you entertained the thought of&#8230;<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":23,"featured_media":87732,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"om_disable_all_campaigns":false,"wprm-recipe-roundup-name":"","wprm-recipe-roundup-description":"","_kad_blocks_custom_css":"","_kad_blocks_head_custom_js":"","_kad_blocks_body_custom_js":"","_kad_blocks_footer_custom_js":"","_monsterinsights_skip_tracking":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_active":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_note":"","_monsterinsights_sitenote_category":0,"_kad_post_transparent":"","_kad_post_title":"","_kad_post_layout":"","_kad_post_sidebar_id":"","_kad_post_content_style":"","_kad_post_vertical_padding":"","_kad_post_feature":"","_kad_post_feature_position":"","_kad_post_header":false,"_kad_post_footer":false,"_kad_post_classname":"","footnotes":""},"categories":[4],"tags":[],"coauthors":[967],"class_list":["post-87729","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-marriage"],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO plugin v26.9 - https:\/\/yoast.com\/product\/yoast-seo-wordpress\/ -->\n<title>When You Want to Quit Your Marriage - Club31Women<\/title>\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"Feeling tempted to quit your marriage? 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